Jeepers Creepers

My first "match made" blind date was with the New York match maker's guy...the real estate developer. He sounded a little creepy on the phone, but he did suggest to meet me in person at Giorgione - so he can't be that bad. The food there is great and so he does have a modicum of taste, at least.

I arrived first and exactly on time. I know I should always be ten minutes late - as no one in New York is ever on time. There was no reservation in his name, the restaurant was packed, and there was a one hour wait for walk-ins. This was not boding well. Hopefully he has some pull with the manager or something?

He showed up 20 minutes late - complaining of traffic. Granted, he probably forgot that he told me where he lives and so I know for a fact that his apartment is a mere four blocks away from the restaurant...but I will let the little white lie pass. Who doesn't lie about being stuck in traffic when late? I then asked him if he had a reservation, knowing full well that he did not, and he started to look nervous. He rushed over to the hostess who then informed him the same thing she had already told me. Fully booked...and we would have to either go somewhere else or wait for an hour...or more. Nice job, loser. I had actually been looking forward to eating at Giorgione more than I had been looking forward to meeting him, so I guess that is what I get for thinking such evil thoughts.

He stood there at a loss and I suggested we head over to Giorgione 508 around the corner - the more casual branch of the same place. We went out into the rain and as I suspected, 508 was completely empty save a few tables because it is really more of a breakfast/lunch place than a date spot, but whatever. At this point, I just wanted to get it over with.

Real Estate guy was boring, hesitant, and had zero game. On his second glass of wine, his neck started to go all red and he had no problem eating off my plate without permission. Ugh - disgusting. If I had wanted to share, we would be in either a Chinese or a fondue restaurant.

On closer inspection, I was finally able to put my finger on what exactly was wrong with the Real Estate guy physically. I mean, he was tall enough, attractive enough, and dressed O.K. (most likely Banana Republic/Kenneth Cole kind of guy) - but there was something definitely off and then it hit me during dinner what it was. His eyes! He had old eyes....a little hazy, yellowish, blurred irises - but oddly taut skin on his face. He was completely over-botoxed and there was no way this guy was 40. In fact, he might have even been 60 with a face lift. I swear.

My first impression of him from the phone had been accurate. He was creepy. Even the waiter didn't like him that much. I can totally imagine this guy on Dateline "To Catch a Predator" series or some similar show.

I just have one word for this experience.....NEXT!