Monday, November 19, 2007

Careful, danger....it's the Rangers!

Annie and I showed up early at the Wall Street location where Amy Sacco's charity "Free Arts" was hosting a massive Thanksgiving dinner for underprivileged children and their families. We were perfect little soldiers doing everything from hauling bags of ice to setting the tables. We colored with children and refilled people's glasses and handed out "New York Rangers" stickers to the little boys...and we were having a great time, actually. I am not quite sure that Amy remembered who we were exactly, but that was fine, as she was busy with her celebrity volunteers that ranged from Alan Cummings to Miss Jay to Parker Posey.

A little more than an hour into the event a group of hot guys showed up that Annie and I were more than happy to see. The event was up and running and we were hard pressed to find any extra errands until clean up time, so we made our way toward the pack of gorgeous men who were standing in a tight group - glancing uncomfortably at the children - and frankly looking a little bit lost. We introduced ourselves....and if I have them straight: there was Ryan from California who was a little chubby, but with a baby face and great floppy hair. Scottie, a Hispanic guy from Alaska with huge doe eyes. Sean, great bone structure with a scar across his face and sexy green eyes. Then Jason - a total fox, who must have been about 6'4" on a short day and finally, Henrik from Sweden....the best looking out of all of them, but the most difficult to talk to - he was actually, almost, a mute. I swear.

A voice behind us called out "Finally...the Rangers made it. Follow me, guys, I will show you where to put your coats and then I will bring you over to Amy." Rangers! Well, I have I have found my new favorite sport. Hockey it is. Wow. Seriously, hot. If I had known that athletes could be this good looking, then I could have paid more attention a long time ago. Better late than never, I suppose.

Toward the end of the event, Annie and I made our way back over to the Rangers. We were literally baffled by choice for once in New York City. They were just a veritable catalogue of men - something for everyone. Short, tall, bald, curls, blue eyes, American, foreign.....they literally were a buffet of options - but time was short...and Annie and I had to make a decision on who to focus in on. We actually pre-planned the ultimate date with the two of our choice - ice skating in Central Park with men who could actually skate. Almost too good to be true - well, that is, of course if we found any Rangers who had any interest in us and who wanted to take us skating? Small detail, but not insurmountable, right?

Annie zoomed in on Henrik (the goal keeper), but he was either not into her or he had difficulties with the English language and was unable to express it. Personally, I found him to be a bit of a cold fish despite his exterior perfections. I liked Sean, but I got the total player vibe off him....so I directed my attention instead toward Scottie from Alaska. He lives about five minutes from my apartment (totally geographically desireable), he had a great soft and scratchy voice, and a real sweetness to him. He asked for my number and said he would call me later. Goal! Little chubster, Ryan, also asked for my (or our?) number a little later....and he was heading off with Jason to see Dane Cook perform that night, so he would call me during the week - but I was hoping to pawn him off on Annie, so we could each have one.

Fair is fair. I would have hoped that she would have given me one of her Rangers as well if she had an extra, of course. Scottie DID call later, as promised - but with an offer for me to come to his apartment and watch Sunday night football with him!? I don't think so! First date, in a strange guy's apartment, watching sports!? That was the worst first date invite I've ever had in my life. We are certainly not off to a great start here, unfortunately. What was he thinking?

Take two, buddy.....you, me, skates, Central Park. Get with the program - before I go back to the days of not even knowing what sport is is you play! Ugh...

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